On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
