So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
