Little spoons don't ask big questions
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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