he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Randomize
