when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize