If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
