love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Randomize
