drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
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