Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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