i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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