bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
