Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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