oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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