i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
