I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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