Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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