Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
It was like getting head from an anaconda
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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