We're like a lot better than the average bears
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
