Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize