There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
