kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize