Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
