she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
false alarm, still single
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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