Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
