used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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