Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Randomize
