wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
