you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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