why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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