Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
