your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
my liver is dry heaving
Randomize
