i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
