As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Randomize
