So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
only you would photoshop your dick
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
