her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Come on in and take your pants off
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