it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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