i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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