so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
How's work?
Spinning.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize