i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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