I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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