Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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