it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
