I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
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