I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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