Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize