he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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