She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
The struggles of a small town man whore
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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