where does the pee come out of this thing
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
