So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
So. Much. Porn.
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