I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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