we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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