help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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