6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
literally had 100 drinks last night.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
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