I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Randomize
