Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
